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Love/Relationship Columnist Author: Mary Jo Rapini, MEd, LPC - Love/Relationship Columnist - Last Updated: Mar 23, 2014 - 4:01:27 PM

10 First Date Killers

By Mary Jo Rapini, MEd, LPC - Love/Relationship Columnist -
Mar 24, 2014 - 12:03:00 AM

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( -  With social media and the access to information most of us have readily available, very rarely do couples go on a first date without knowing a little bit about each person. Blind dates are never blind in the social media age, and that means you are researched prior to meeting up or shortly thereafter. With this knowledge come consequences if you've lived a life you are trying to escape. People are varied in what they see as first date killers, but here are ten of the most common date killers cited.

1.      Any suggestion that you are currently in a relationship. This is easy to trace.

2.      A prison record or any issue you've had with the law. A person who is interested in you won't look away from a DWI or other legal issues.

3.      Any mention of having an anger management problem. It doesn't matter who started it if you have an issue with controlling your temper.

4.      Any photos of you acting crazy and out of control. Be careful what you post on Facebook.

5.      Photos of you cross-dressing or suggesting you live a double life. Halloween is the one exception to this rule, but clarify that.

6.      Sending a rude email, text or post on Facebook to the person you will be meeting up with.

7.      Lying or misleading someone interested in you. This usually happens when telling someone you have a more important or prestigious life, job or whatever than you have.

8.      Having kids. If you have kids, it is better to make sure you mention it up front so anyone interested in you understands your kids will take priority.

9.      Being unemployed. This may look like a red flag for people who are looking for an equal to date.

10.   Your physical presentation. Let's face it, if you posted yourself looking 20 years younger or 20 pounds lighter than you currently are, meeting you will be a shock and not a good one.

First dates are interviews for second dates and beyond. First dates are for you to evaluate if you see a potential relationship or red flags flying. The more real you are with your life, the more likely a first date will lead to a second. Never settle if you go out with someone who makes you question his or her transparency. Trust your gut. As a general rule, people who are well adjusted are transparent and accepting of their past.  -Mary Jo Rapini

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